Grateful

Right now it's 4:30 in the morning. I've been suffering from sleep depravation for months now. Well i should say for years on and off, but right now seems to be the worst it has ever been. it's not fun. Knowing you will wake up in the dead of night and be wide awake. Most of the time I just lay in my bed and toss and turn. But lately I've found getting up and doing something for an hour or so helps me get back to sleep quicker. Tonight, (well this morning), i started thinking of all my blessings. My life has not exactly gone the way i pictured it. Some due to my own choices. Some not. But i have never been lacking of blessings. I have the most amazing kids in the world. I miss them when they aren't with me. Not knowing where they are or what they are doing is hard for me, but it makes me all the more glad to be with them when they are home. I'm grateful for a husband who is wants to spend time with them and do fun things with them. I'm grateful for friends who sacrifice to help me in a time of great need, or are just there in case i need them. Friends who send kind words via text message, email or voice mail. Friends who invite me to be with them, so i'm not alone. i am grateful for brothers who i sometimes forget i have, but when it really matters, step up to the task and support me. i have five of them and I wouldn't have it any other way. I'm grateful for temples that seal families and children together forever. To feel that joy and know that no matter what, it will be alright. For the protection we feel when we are there. I'm grateful for parents who never give up, or stop caring, or stop loving, who are probably lying awake worrying about me right now as I type. Grateful to walk into a ward I left a year ago and be embraced as if I never left. Grateful that me body will carry me while I run. It's such a therapeutic time to just be able to think and feel, time that's just for me. Grateful for sister-in-laws who support, understand, and love unconditionally. Grateful most of all for a Savior who suffered what I suffer, who loves me so much, He never gives up or turns away when I fall and stumble. Who shares my joys and my sorrows. Grateful for a Heavenly father that does answer prayers. Who does care that i am happy. Who understands what we need even when we don't. I'm GRATEFUL.